Diary Day
ashley's Diary
Date 10 Sep 2006
Country SA Kimberley
Weather Sunny
Diary Kimberly This town seems to be in the process of dieing. One of the most famous residents was Cecil John Rhodes, founder of Rhodesia, now Zimbabwe. CJR was a sickly son of a vicar in Devon and was sent to SA at the age of 18 to make his fortune. Ended up controlling De Beers, the diamond monopoly and quite a few of the goldmines in Jo’burg .He spent the siege of Kimberly (during the Boer War) organising the defence and getting his De Beers engineering workshop to turn out a cannon to rival the Boers’. The De Beers gun could lob 47kg shells marked with a diamond symbol and was quite effective by all accounts. His ambition was to expand the British Empire in Africa from the Cape to Cairo and he was also very keen to re-integrate those naughty American colonists back into the Empire. Luckily for the Americans the British government was dominated by the liberals always backing away from expanding the Empire as an unnecessary expense. Funnily enough it isn’t really possible to start your own empire anymore unless you’re Mark Thatcher who was so impressed with soldiers in general he hired a plane load of mercenaries to take over an oil rich African state to be ruled by proxy through a black dictator….in fact quite similar to how a small insignificant country like Britain managed to rule an empire comprising 25% of the population of the world. Still pathetically failing to “rule” my own family so not much chance of taking over Africa! Thinking of standing for Parliament in Bath on my return for Plaid Cymru (the national party of Wales) on a “return Bath to Wales policy” (lost in the battle of Dryham in the 5th Century) Probably get one vote (mine) Kimberley very famous for diamonds although all the big ones seemed to end up as presents to the British Royal family. “Oh not another SA diamond dear”! Now in crown jewels I am pretty sure that the biggest diamond in the worlds is not in Texas but in the Tower of London in the Queen’s crown. PIC SHOWS: Never leave home without your top hat. Gives you a height advantage over dwarves.
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